Life's Legacy ~ Finding YOUR Self Worth

In 1998 I was asked to speak to a group of girls, ages 14-18, about self-esteem. I actually thought this was a little hilarious becaue I had just gotten divorced & my self-esteem was....AWOL. But, not wanting to disappoint the person who asked me (my mom) I sat down and began a 3 month writing project. I wrote and devised an entire workshop for over 80 girls and their adult leaders, including a workbook and other tools that went along with the workshop. It was a success. I can't take any credit for it, I know I was led. Even before I began the workshop I had been led to those who could teach me the things I stood up and taught in two sessions to all these very impressionable minds. To this day, many of those girls are still my friends. They aren't girls anymore, they are grown women; wives, mothers, professsionals etc. But each one told me more than once, it had a profound effect on them. The leaders and their parents said the same. This was another thing I thought to be funny. I was certain I was the only one to have learned anything at all.

Each workshop was only an hour long. But in the workbook, now that was the meat of the project...it was filled with empty lines for them to do homework. I had learned in a parents self-care group (for healing post-divorce) a few things. I can't attribute them to any one in particular, I don't know who taught the facilitators of my group. So if you made this stuff up, my apologies. No one told me your name. Nonetheless, these lessons I was passing on to these girls had changed me. I wanted them to change the girls too. Now only a portion of the exercises were learned in my group....alot of the other stuff...I made up. And much to my surprise, it was good. It was all proof to me that the teacher often does have more to learn than the student. And I knew I didn't write that program. I was led.

The first three things from the workshop I want to introduce to you were the first three things I learned. It requires a notebook or journal. I took this so seriously I went out and bought a fancy journal and used colored pens. It makes absolutely no difference at all. The only suggestion I would make is that whatever you use, make sure you can keep it. You will want to go back and see your progress. These are very easy and only take a few minutes a day. Now, ask yourself, is a stronger sense of worth valuable enough to you to spend a few minutes per day writing these things down? YES! And if you do it, I promise it will change your life, quickly. And in good ways.

Exercise #1

Write down 3 things that you are grateful for.
Example:
I am grateful for:
1. My freedoms
2. My family
3. My spiritutality

Exercise #2

Write down what brings you joy.
Example:
1. My children's laughter
2. Jonquills
3. Helping others

Exercise #3

Write down what you like about yourself.
Example:
1. My red hair
2. I love to laugh
3. I never give up

A year and a half before the workshop, I was sitting at my little kitchen table, with the morning sun coming in through the window. Day after day I would write down whatever popped into my head first. After about four months of dutifully making my lists I realized something; it had all taken a turn I hadn't expected ~ I was grateful for ME, I brought me joy, I liked me.

Inspiration for today:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually. Who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

~Nelson Mandela, 1994